Assumed IgnoranceLet a Man Show You How to Do Your Job

Hey Tim, do you need a little help?” Cindy asked. Tim was just performing a simple tire change – something he’d done thousands of times. Although Cindy was the shop manager, Tim had been in the automotive industry a decade longer than she had, so he assured his less-experienced co-worker that everything was under control. “Tim… If you use this wrench… No, over here is a better position for the jack… That lug nut needs to be a little tighter.”

“Enough!” Tim thought. “I don’t need some little girl who knows nothing telling me how to do MY job!” What he actually said? Nothing. He just did as he was told, like a good boy.

Aw, Tim didn’t enjoy the mansplaining, huh?

Mansplain (verb): to explain something to a woman in a condescending way that assumes she has no knowledge about the topic (source).

It can be pretty annoying, especially when your experience and knowledge surpasses your “instructor.” Look guys – unless you’d like women to assume your beer belly (or big nose or small hands) makes you impotent, stop assuming that women are stupid or incompetent just because we have vaginas!

The assumption that women are less knowledgeable is a kind of stereotype, which we discussed last week. And actually, this is a stereotype that is most often thrown at young women – and even young men. Which is crazy since younger generations are more tech-savvy after having grown up with computers. When a person is treated like they’re stupid frequently enough, they eventually internalize that belief. They question their intelligence, their value. This often happens subconsciously, impacting their self-confidence and even leading to reduced performance.

“Women can be beautiful and smart. They just choose to play down their intelligence so they can survive and get along with others during the times in history when women didn’t have equal rights, couldn’t speak out, and were considered property.”

• Kailin Gow, Strong

For women in the automotive and skilled labor trades industries, being treated as less intelligent than, or inferior to, men is a pathetically common occurrence. Nearly 60% of surveyed women reported feeling they’d had their “professional influence and credibility undermined by colleagues because of [their] gender,” and 65% have been asked to perform lower-level tasks, such as note-taking or ordering food, that male peers are not asked to do. Nearly 83% admitted that clients and colleagues address questions to their male peers that should be addressed to them (source).

Now, we aren’t trying to lay a guilt trip on you – we’ve all had that thought (or quite a few of them) we were ashamed to say out loud. But even though we don’t verbalize them, those thoughts can manifest in our actions and our interactions, often influencing others without our awareness. We’ve done it.

Well, I just took a break from editing this – today was a great day to take a ride on Ronnie, my ’96 Harley Sportster. I’m not a winter rider; I’m a wimp when it comes to cold weather. So I’d forgotten the looks I get. I just rode around my neighborhood a bit (it’s still cool and windy enough that I have no desire to deal with the chill at 50+ mph). Besides the fact that everyone in their yards stared, and ignoring the kudos I received from another woman at the gas station for “riding like a man” since I know it was intended as a compliment… One guy was so busy staring that he would have hit Ronnie (and me, of course) if I hadn’t swerved. A couple blocks over, a little girl on a bicycle was so engrossed with the sight of a female rider that SHE nearly got ran over. Can we just normalize women doing whatever the fuck they want to do, as long as they aren’t hurting anyone else? Please? With sprinkles?

Women prove themselves capable, intelligent, strong over and over again. Yet, her ideas are discounted, she’s assigned menial tasks, and each day, she shrinks; she’s less likely to share her insights, no longer eager to learn and grow. What valuable inventions and process improvements never come to fruition – are never even uttered! – due to all the times she’s been shut down in the past?

Bertha Benz-- "She believed in more than a car. She believed in herself!"

Without Margaret A. Wilcox, we wouldn’t have the car heater. Bertha Benz designed the first brake pads. Manual windshield wipers were created by Mary Anderson, and movie star Florence Lawrence invented the turn signal – can we say brains and beauty?! And don’t forget who led the design team for the Acura NSX: Michelle Christensen.

So, women obviously have some great ideas in those pretty brains of theirs, but when so many women feel stifled, most of those innovations never see the light of day. If you encourage the women around you to reveal their thoughts in a productive way and you actually take those thoughts into consideration –
How much ingenuity could you tap into?

working right. I recommended a solution TWICE and was met with lackluster enthusiasm, no action. One of the guys recommended exactly what I had been saying, and suddenly it was the best idea ever! Surprise…it worked!”

• Tennessee, 24 years old

Chasidy & Jayme’s Reaction

Chasidy reaction: Chasidy reaction: OMG, my absolute FAVORITE thing ever is when I’m igno#cfcf5a & then a man repeats my thought – and is lauded as a damn genius. “I guess him just speak them words much more better than me poorly can.” OK, that was physically painful and cringey AF to type, so no, that’s not accurate; that just ain’t it. Men are not inherently smarter than women any more than women are inherently kinder than men. Dudes can be dumbasses, and ladies can be bitches (for the record, so can guys, ah-hem). That’s the truth. It’s about the individual person, not about their gender. And guess what? Dude that recommended what our Tennessee gal said twice, not once but TWICE… Y’all ain’t even gonna believe this – but it wasn’t his idea! And he knew it. But it was obviously a good idea, and he heard her, probably both times. Let me tell ya how he could have won-won this situation – as soon as everyone agreed what a great idea it was, he could have just tacked on, “Tennessee over here said that a minute ago, but I think I’m the only one who heard her.” Look at that, c#cfcf5ait given without being confrontational.

Ironically, when I look back, the most pressure to “act like a girl” came from the women in my life. I realized it in college, during my first Women’s Studies course, when everyone was sharing the same key phrases – but most of them were quoting their fathers. I raised my hand and proudly sha#cfcf5a, “My dad is the one person who never made me feel like I should be anything or anyone other than exactly who I am – and he never even implied that being female should limit me in anyway.” Thank you, Daddy <3

Okay, you know you’ve been there. In that exact situation. You recommend the perfect solution, and nobody pays a bit of attention, maybe they don’t even acknowledge you. Five minutes later, maybe ten, someone else regurgitates your idea. Slightly reworded sure, but you’d think they invented the wheel based on how the rest of the group acts. It’s frustrating as hell, ain’t it?

“A woman who thinks she is intelligent demands the same rights as man. An intelligent woman gives up.”

• Sidonie Gabrielle Colette

I know I sound like a broken record here, but being a broken record is better than breaking something or someone, right? Women have a different viewpoint, so they offer a different perspective! Yet, 23% of women report being treated like they’re incompetent in the workplace, 10% are passed over for key projects, and 7% are rejected from jobs. This compares to men at 6%, 5%, and 4%, respectively (source).

Age definitely plays a factor as well – for both genders, but more so for women. Jayme has already explained how demeaning it is when grown women are constantly referred to as “girls,” but it goes beyond the mere words into the infantilization of women. That’s a whole subject of its own, but here’s a study that explores the topic in detail.

We, as men, as women, as an industry, as a society, need to stop treating “different” as “bad,” “stupid,” and “inferior.” We can do better, and it’s time to do better. And if you still think that words aren’t important… guess you have nothing to be upset about anyway – these are just words, after all.

“A customer actually told my boss to help me replace a taillight because he didn’t like a “girl” working on his car. He even asked, ‘Does she actually know what she’s doing?’ My boss told him I’d be fine. “

• Minnesota, 28 years old

Chasidy & Jayme’s Reaction
Chasidy reaction: Well, I ranted quite effectively on the last one, and now, as I feel rage boiling inside me for what I logically know isn’t uncommon, isn’t really THAT offensive… I realize that I should have started by explaining that this is a sensitive topic for me. My intelligence is something I pride myself on. Now, I’m not the smartest person in any room, but I can generally hold my own. And in a room where I’m completely incompetent, I have no problem admitting that I’m there to learn. When I think of disrespect, it’s people treating me like I’m stupid. Of all the hurtful things loved ones have said, one of the worst was when one of the men I love most called me “a silly little girl” when we disagreed; I was in my twenties. So yeah, I seriously HATE being treated like I’m stupid. But it was a common occurrence when I was younger. In high school, I was a cheerleader. I was a busty cheerleader, so essentially, most people assumed I was a “dumb slut.” I was neither. Even the people who knew me pretty well, my friends, conside#cfcf5a me average intellectually. I remember arguing with a close friend because I had tested into higher level classes; another was shocked when she realized we were neck-and-neck on our GPA. Both of those were female friends. We women discount one another a lot too. If men are ever going to respect us, we need to start respecting ourselves and each other, ladies. This isn’t a competition.

This is a man’s world. Women can’t do this job. You’re not strong enough, tall enough, butch enough, smart enough, good enough. Enough… ENOUGH! Possessing vaginas does not make women incapable, and it surely doesn’t diminish their intelligence. But since we’ve already gone there, a question for the men: what percentage of the time does your smaller brain wrest power from the one on top of your shoulders?

“An intelligent woman has millions of born enemies… all the stupid men.”

• Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach

Although it’s a common assumption that women are less intelligent than men, research proves otherwise. A study published by Cambridge indicates “that there are no overall (average) differences between women and men in general intelligence, but there are some large and persistent differences on cognitive abilities that on average favor males (e.g. mathematics, mental rotation, mechanical) or favor females (verbal ability, most tests of memory).”

Still, male and female brains DO differ in some ways. A study conducted by the University of California, Irvine indicated that a man’s brain has around 6.5 times the amount of gray matter contained in a woman’s brain, while a women’s brain boasts 9 times a male brain’s white matter. This means that women process information differently (source).

According to the Harvard Business Review, “Because gray matter characterizes information processing centers and white matter facilitates the connections among those centers, scientists theorize that those differences might explain why men tend to excel in tasks that depend on sheer processing while women show relative strength in tasks that call for assimilating and integrating disparate pieces of information… neither brain type performs better than the other on broad measures of cognitive ability such as intelligence tests. The differences, however, have implications for how decisions are made.”

We’ve often heard the statistic that men will apply for a job if they meet 60% of the posting’s qualifications, but women refrain unless they meet 100% of the employer’s prerequisites. (Read more about the reasons here.) Similarly, women demand a higher level of certainty before acting, while men are more prone to taking risks when stressed (source), so when a woman hesitates, she’s simply processing the information to get to the level of certainty she needs – that short pause doesn’t have any damn correlation to her competence. Because if she can’t do it, she’s going to let you know (as long as you haven’t created an environment where she feels uncomfortable doing that)!

“While doing a full set of wheels and tyre changes, a gentlemen said, ‘Let me show you.’ Now, I’ve done this many times, and I wasn’t struggling, didn’t need help – and when I told him ‘I’ve got it,’ he informed me, ‘You shouldn’t be doing this – I don’t know why they sent you. They should have sent a man. This isn’t a job for you.’ I know that their comments are more a reflection of themselves and their beliefs than it is a reflection of me… Realising that makes it easier to shrug off.”

• North Yorkshire, England, 22 years old

Chasidy & Jayme’s Reaction
Chasidy reaction: I’m sorry… Are y’all men using your dicks to jack up cars for tire changes now, or as the dipstick in an oil change? Nah? Then why the hell shouldn’t a woman be changing tires or anything else? That’s the only equipment y’all have that she doesn’t. Sidenote: If you CAN do that change a tire with your cock, I’m pretty sure you can make a killing on OnlyFans. No, please don’t send us the link. But, seriously, I don’t know how many ways I can say that my vagina doesn’t tell me what I should be doing, what I like (excepting partners, though sometimes my vag gets overruled by my brain, thankfully), or anything else.

You wouldn’t offer to help a dentist examine your teeth, and if you’re doublechecking your accountant’s math, it’d probably time to find a new number-cruncher. Yet, teeth are teeth, and math is the same in every language. Each manufacturer, each model, each year of vehicle necessitates a different set of data. Automotive industry professionals must have at least as much knowledge and training as most other professionals; they’ve been bombarded by ever-changing technologies for as long as most of us can remember.

Automotive is a STEM career (Science, Technology, Engineering & Mathematics, in case you’ve been living under a rock, and working in automotive requires all four to varying extents). And as electric vehicles and autonomous driving technology becomes more common, those advances are only going to come faster.

This means that it is a highly specialized and skilled industry, so when a woman, or a man, has obtained the skillset needed to perform repairs on the vehicle, they damn well know what they are doing. Read more about the connection between automotive and STEM.

“When I was working at the quick lube, this oil change customer was being disrespectful to our female service advisor, demanding to speak to a man because ‘women aren’t qualified’ and telling her she ‘should not be doing a man’s job.’ He made her cry! My supervisor was very upset so he asked me to do the oil change – which the customer could see through the huge windows looking into the lube pit from the waiting area. I was glad to do it, alone – I hope that burned him.”

• Canada, 27 years old

Chasidy & Jayme's Reaction
Chasidy reaction:Let me spit some wisdom at y’all, courtesy of my godson. I think it was his 13th birthday, maybe his 14th, but on the way to the gun range, I was explaining why I don’t buy my ammo at a certain establishment (I literally had to have a man vouch for me before they would show me a Springfield XDS .45; they offe#cfcf5a me a fucking .22). This sweet, perfect barely-a-teenager looked at me as indignantly as I’d ever seen him look and say, “But Aunt Chas, why does it matter if you’re a girl? They’re stupid to act like that. Girls can like guns too, they can like anything, just like boys can like anything. Right?” That kid inspires me all the time.

We’ve all heard of the glass ceiling, but many women never get to experience that worry; barriers to advancement start at the bottom with the sticky floor, which is “used to describe a discriminatory employment pattern that keeps a certain group of people at the bottom of the job scale…Close to half of working women, compared to one-sixth of working men, hold clerical or service jobs which are often associated with the ‘sticky floor’ (source). You can learn more about this form of inequality and its impact here.

“My paint instructor in college told me I’ll never be able to paint well or get anywhere in the industry because I’m female. I busted my ass, qualified for SkillsUSA Nationals – twice – and came back with silver in post-secondary refinish my second year, and I have since had two jobs as the only painter. His words pushed me to prove him wrong – an instructor certainly should not be saying things like that.”

• Michigan, 26 years old

Chasidy & Jayme's Reaction
Chasidy reaction: At least she has some balls. (Ok, I hesitated just a sec on that one because I know that Jayme has some thoughts on that phrase.) Thankfully, there are women who push past the taunts, the degradation, the complete and utter bullshit. If there weren’t, we wouldn’t have women in the automotive or skilled labor trades. Those are the women who brush it off, who hold their head up despite all the rumors and jokes. She’s strong, she’s formidable. And we are in absolute awe of her. But here’s the thing – she shouldn’t HAVE to be that strong! Also, it’s a miracle we still have young women entering the trades when we see so much of this discriminatory behavior coming from teachers. When the industry told you to “shape young minds,” this wasn’t what they meant. Like seriously, just stop. Stop treating people like this. Stop treating women like this.

“Nothing is so necessary for a young man as the company of intelligent women.”

• Leo Tolstoy

OK, so you know how the automotive industry needs more female technicians? Well, their career path begins with obtaining an education that will allow them to enter a shop with the skills necessary to safely repair vehicles. If their instructor, the person providing that education (which puts them in a mentorship position), is demeaning their attempts and telling them they don’t belong – well, how much strength would you need to disregard the belief of a mentor who didn’t believe you were good enough?

Ladies, we’re mainly talking to you here (but guys, don’t tune out, it still applies!): It is vital that we support the women that walk beside us. Mentorship is critical to career success, yet this survey indicates that 63% of women have never had a formal mentor – generally because they don’t ask. And the same study shows that, contrary to popular cat-fighting beliefs, most women choose to mentor because they want to support other women (80%). Here’s why female mentors are so important.

Hey guys, hope you’re still paying attention because women need male mentors – just as much as men need female mentors. Men and women offer different strengths and weaknesses. Want to know why? Because different people have a variety of things to offer, and whether someone is a man or a woman, you CAN learn something from them if you’re open-minded.

Seriously, I’ve been mentored by so many amazing men AND women, even boys and girls. Everyone is so beautifully unique, and if you actually listen to them, learn from them, you get to keep a little bit of that wisdom for yourself. And to be fair, I’ve never asked anyone to mentor me; most of the people I consider mentors probably have no idea that’s the case. Thank you to everyone who has taught me, inspired me, believed in me over the years.

Not surprisingly, mentoring women helps them advance in leadership positions, an important effort for the industry as a whole since, according to Automotive News, “Studies have shown that companies with diverse leadership teams are eight times more likely to have better business outcomes, six times more likely to be innovative and agile and 21 percent more likely to outperform on profitability when in the top quartile for gender diversity. Cultural, gender and demographic diversity will make a difference in the long-term success of the auto industry.”

Some more valuable information from the Deloitte and Automotive News study: “An organization’s ability to drive change around DE&I; starts with leadership, which can be challenging when 70% of women believe minorities are underrepresented in their company’s senior management team. Recognize the benefits of diversity, equity, and inclusion: A stronger commitment to creating a diverse leadership team may also lead to tangible benefits, including more holistic decision-making and improved financial performance. Provide a clear path to advancement: Mentorship is critical as 60% of women are targeting a senior management position in their career, but only two-thirds of them see a clear path to get there (compared with 75% of men). Learn from other industries: The top two destinations for women who said they would choose a different industry if they started their career today are high tech (30%) and health care (20%), as they are perceived as leading sectors for attracting and retaining a diverse workforce.”

OK, what is the third Dirty Little Secret?

The Automotive and Skilled Labor Trades Industries are just that – SKILLED! Women require just as many SKILLS to perform the job as men do. And they’ve worked just as hard, if not harder, to get to where they are today.

Assuming that a woman is ignorant, stupid, just because she’s not a man isn’t half as funny as this joke: Why does the doctor smack babies on the butt after they are born?
A: To make sure the dicks get knocked off the smart ones.

We previously acknowledged that this is a subcategory of stereotyping, and last week, we shared a lot of facts on why stereotyping is so harmful – both for the individual and the industry as a whole.

And in case you missed it: Stereotyping is dangerous. Your belief about a person influences what you think about them, how you feel about them, and ultimately, how you treat them. If left unchecked, stereotyping transforms into a stepping-stone, creating a path to discrimination and bigotry.

What can you do?

Mentor women. Mentor men too. Mentor girls, mentor boys. The point? This industry needs fresh blood, and new employees – in any position, in any industry – need guidance. In the automotive and skilled labor industries, women are less likely to receive that guidance. Yeah, we saw earlier that a large reason for that is that she just doesn’t ask. We acknowledge that women cause some of our own problems – but can you really say that men don’t do the same?! (And if you’re thinking, “they don’t,” I counter: “HA!”)

But leaving that squirrel alone, now that we know women are less likely to ask for mentors, why not offer to mentor a new female co-worker or student Or even better, ask a more tenured female to mentor you (this is addressed to men and women!).

Although we aren’t going to dive into this in-depth because it could be a series of its own, I want to take a second to stress the importance of supporting the next generation by working with students at local high schools and colleges – this is the FUTURE of your industry, folks! In the automotive world, check out the Collision Repair Education Foundation or WrenchWay for more information on how you can get involved.)

Guys: You know the drill. Support women – speak up when you see this type of discrimination; that’s how you become an ally. And if you’re an ally (or want to learn more), keep reading for more ways you can support women. But we want to support y’all too by providing a little something just for the guys who’ve stuck with us…

Women are typically assumed to be stupid, but men are assumed to be emotionless. Boys don’t cry. Man up. Stop acting like a girl. We talked about that stereotype a little last week, and we wanted to provide some possible reading materials if you’re interested in a little self-empowerment of your own.

Women: There are lots of great “for women” groups and organizations out there where you can find a mentor, often in a low-key, less intimidating virtual world (especially in today’s environment). A quick Google search of your interest, followed by the word “women,” should yield contact information for other women in your field, possibly even organizations or associations dedicated to advancing women’s careers.

Resources

Tools for the Men:

• Grow Up: A Man’s Guide to Masculine Emotional Intelligence by Owen Marcus file a claim with the EEOC.
• Nothing’s Wrong: A Man’s Guide to Managing His Feelings by David Kundtz
• Guy Stuff Feelings: Everything you need to know about your emotions by Cara Natterson

Tools for the Women :

• Driven Magazine
• Featuring Inspiring Women
• RV Industry Tradeswomen
• Tradeswomen Inc.
• Women in Automotive
• Women in Non-Traditional Careers
• Women in Stem
• Women’s Industry Network
• If “assumed ignorance” leads to pay discrimination, here’s where you can file a complaint.